Grace writes:

I had wanted to update the blog for a long time. Have had many experiences – about the birth and the past 3 weeks of motherhood – but had not been able to find time and energy to do so.

GG is 3 weeks old already – and I am 3 weeks old as a mother! Her helplessness - needing food, needing to be cleaned whenever she soils herself, needing to be held close, comforted and given attention in this new world where she finds herself in – is often a reflection of my own helplessness in this new role as a mother.

How to latch on properly for breastfeeding, how to burp her, how long to burp her, how to carry her securely – these are all lessons in Motherhood 101. I haven’t finished this module yet – my mother has been a great help in so many ways – she bathes GG everyday – I told myself, wait till GG is a month old first (more like, wait till I am a month old as a mother first) before I move on from the Basic Basics to the Intermediate Basics. Afterall, food and comfort are more basic needs than a need to be clean, right? (Elijah will probably disagree with me on this point! Equally important, he will say.)

One of the main things I have learnt in this 3 weeks is that – I can’t bring up a child alone. No way. Children are not meant to be brought up by just one care-giver. The task is too huge and demanding on one person – unless it is Superwoman, and I’m no Superwoman.

God put newborns in families, with father and mother, grandparents, uncles and aunts, cousins, experienced and concerned friends, etc. so that all these people, to different extents, play significant parts in the child’s growing up. Likewise, as a newbie-mother, I have found this circle of support to be a great help to me.

I found myself gaining a new appreciation of my mother in these 3 weeks – how she has been looking after me – cooking, washing (confinement period, not supposed to touch water – so I don’t even need to wash the plates after meals!), boiling water for my bath and use, helping to carry GG and sing to her, talk to her, pray for her. Earlier on when my breastmilk supply was not stable and there was not enough milk for GG who was crying and struggling, I really felt like giving up breastfeeding because I thought it was too stressful for me and affecting mum and dad whom I was staying with. Mum saw my tears and asked me about it. Then she responded “Breastfeeding is a process – just continue on in this process”.

In my anxiety with the stress of the moment, I had lost sight of the bigger picture – that not having enough breastmilk is one of the steps in the journey of breastfeeding, and if we continue and not give up, in the natural process, milk supply will increase.

How thankful I was for a wise mother. She offered me the bigger perspective when I all I could see was the agony of the moment. Thank God for mothers! May this newbie-mother also go through the lessons of Motherhood 101, 201, 301… and many electives – and I don’t know when I will ever graduate – and learn the value of persevering in the process.

Many things to write about – have been pondering many things in my heart – but will steal another time to do so.

Thanks for all your concern for us! God bless you!