A Future Tomorrow
A FUTURE TOMORROW
Written on: 5 Mar 06
Posted on: 6 Mar 06
Tomorrow begins another crazy week. Each week that passed must have only been by the grace of God. Otherwise, I would have collapsed mentally and emotionally long time ago. I wonder how I have survived so far.
Next week: will it be the same? Yes, the grace of God will be sufficient for me. But I am barely holding up using my own strength. Although I survived each week, mediocrity has crept into my work and I am not feeling fulfilled professionally and spiritually. Sometimes at the thought and sight of the piling work and impossible datelines, I just let lethargy take the better of me.
The thoughts of wanting to return back to study came back again. I have lost my professional edge and worst still, my spiritual sensitivity. Perhaps returning back to study might give me an extended and reflective break from 12 incessant years of work and ministry since my graduation in 1994.
But I ask: what will study really give me? - A false sense of intellectual security? – A re-inflated professional ego? – Pumping up once more my mental prowess? – A return back to old glory and familiar command, much as Peter returned back to his old trade?
So I fear: will this place me out of God’s will? Am I conjuring up my own dreams rather placing the Kingdom of God first?
Anyway, I have to face tomorrow first. I want to begin tomorrow different – with a new outlook and a different courage, plus a fresh grip on God’s grace and a re-entry into the mind of Christ.
Oh Lord, won’t You help me, please!
Elij-yah
Written on: 5 Mar 06
Posted on: 6 Mar 06
Tomorrow begins another crazy week. Each week that passed must have only been by the grace of God. Otherwise, I would have collapsed mentally and emotionally long time ago. I wonder how I have survived so far.
Next week: will it be the same? Yes, the grace of God will be sufficient for me. But I am barely holding up using my own strength. Although I survived each week, mediocrity has crept into my work and I am not feeling fulfilled professionally and spiritually. Sometimes at the thought and sight of the piling work and impossible datelines, I just let lethargy take the better of me.
The thoughts of wanting to return back to study came back again. I have lost my professional edge and worst still, my spiritual sensitivity. Perhaps returning back to study might give me an extended and reflective break from 12 incessant years of work and ministry since my graduation in 1994.
But I ask: what will study really give me? - A false sense of intellectual security? – A re-inflated professional ego? – Pumping up once more my mental prowess? – A return back to old glory and familiar command, much as Peter returned back to his old trade?
So I fear: will this place me out of God’s will? Am I conjuring up my own dreams rather placing the Kingdom of God first?
Anyway, I have to face tomorrow first. I want to begin tomorrow different – with a new outlook and a different courage, plus a fresh grip on God’s grace and a re-entry into the mind of Christ.
Oh Lord, won’t You help me, please!
Elij-yah
posted by eng at
2:53 AM
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